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thebighop
07-26-2007, 10:45 PM
HOW TO INSTALL A TENNESSEE HOME SECURITY SYSTEM

1. Go to a second-hand store and buy a pair of men's used size 14-16 work
boots.

2. Place them on your front porch, along with several empty beer cans, a
copy of Guns & Ammo magazine and several NRA magazines.

3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazines.

4. Leave a note on your door that reads:

Hey Bubba,

Big Dave, Duke and Slim and I went to the gun shop for more ammunition. Back
in an hour. Don't mess with the pit bulls... they attacked the mailman this
morning and messed him up real bad. I don't think Killer took part in it,
but it was hard to tell from all the blood.

P. S. I locked all four of 'em in the house. Better wait outside.